Title Goes He—Pork Chop!
California, Ignoring & Inattentive, Medical Office, Patients, San Francisco, USA | Healthy | August 6, 2018
Doctor: “Did you bring your MRI?”
Patient: “I drove home to get my MRI, and, yes, I got it; but when I was there I was looking in the refrigerator and I saw pork chops, and I started thinking about pork chops for dinner and how great those are going to be! Well, the pork chops forced the MRI out of my mind, and I forgot all about the MRI and left it on the kitchen table!”
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Same Old Tired Story
Bizarre, Hospital, Nurses, Patients, Tennessee, USA | Healthy | August 6, 2018
(My nurse recounts this story to my father, her coworker, after I wake up from appendix surgery.)
Nurse: “I’m getting her to recovery and expecting her to be out for another few minutes when she suddenly sits up, turns to me, and tells me in the most deadpan voice, ‘Hey, I’m going to throw up now. Sorry,’ and spews. Then she makes a face, lays back down, and falls right back asleep.”
Dad: *snorts* “Funny thing is, sleep-walking and -talking runs in our family. I do it, and my sister does it. It wouldn’t surprise me if my daughter does, too.”
Nurse: “She warned me. Maybe she just woke up for a minute.”
Dad: “She’s a teenager. She hasn’t been awake since she was twelve.”
(And that’s when I ACTUALLY woke up from the surgery and started grumbling about feeling groggy. Either way, I don’t remember puking, or telling the nurse I was going to. And to be fair to my dad, it’s ten years later, and I’m STILL always tired.)
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