Eye See Death
Bad Behavior, British Columbia, Canada, Optometrist/Optician, Patients, Vancouver | Healthy | May 21, 2018
(A customer and her husband have walked in and I go over to help them find some glasses. During our conversation, I ask the wife if they’ve seen an optometrist, as we have one on staff that accepts walk-ins.)
Customer: “Yes, we’ve already seen an optometrist. Several, actually. It took us a long time to find one that we like.”
Me: “Oh, I’m sorry to hear that. I’m glad that you found one that you liked.”
Customer: “Yes, they were all so awful. One was so bad that we had to report him to the Board of Optometrists!”
(I usually avoid getting into the politics and gossip regarding other optometrists, so I try to keep my response vague. The wife seems to be getting more agitated the more she talks about it.)
Me: “Oh, I’m sorry to hear about that.”
Customer: “Well, I heard he’s dead now, anyway, so that’s good!”
Me: “Wow… That’s actually really horrible.”
Customer: “Oh. I guess I shouldn’t say things like that, should I?”
(The customer shrugged and turned to ask her husband a question, completely unfazed. I’ve worked all kinds of retail over 15 years now, and I’ve never heard something so awful come out of someone’s mouth before. I left them alone to look and never helped the couple again.)
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Carrot Top, Meet Carrot Bottom…
Doctor/Physician, Medical Office, Patients, Rude & Risque, Stupid, USA | Healthy | May 18, 2018
(I’m a medical student. My neighbor who is a doctor tells me this story. She has a patient with something stuck.)
Neighbor: “So, you were cleaning the kitchen naked, tripped, and ended up with a carrot up your rectum?”
Patient: *red-faced* “Yes…”
Neighbor: “Honey, I’m a doctor. This is far from the weirdest case I’ve had. I also don’t have the right to comment on people and their experiments.”
Patient: “So, when will I get this out?”
Neighbor: “After the proctologist sees you.”
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